I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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