then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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