ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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