who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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