We're like a lot better than the average bears
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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