you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Barsexuality is the new black.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize