Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
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