A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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