She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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