i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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