Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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