she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
