I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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