that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
