Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
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