i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
