I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
