No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
