remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
We left the knife in your bed.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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