whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i think i have herpe
just one?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize