Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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