Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
