garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
