omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
