i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
