You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
