your room smells of hookers.
And success
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize