I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize