so let's talk penis.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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