my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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