She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
