I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
