so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
