worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
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