i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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