Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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