i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize