it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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