its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
