hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
