Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
