Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
