We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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