My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
