The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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