I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
