I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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