to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I party with great urgency now.
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