used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize