Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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