So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize