Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
