By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
